Texting. It’s something you just have to do if you want to communicate with anyone too young to remember the original line-up of KISS. I have to admit, I take a dim view of it, best summed up by Bradley Cooper in the movie The Hangover. My great fear is that one day my sorry butt’s gonna get clipped by someone texting while otherwise engaged…
Still, I do appreciate the shorthand nature of texting. But being a marketing consultant working with Baby Boomers, I’ve come to learn that it’s going to be a while before the older set gets on-board with anything other that LOL or LMAO.
So…in an effort to bridge the generational divide, here’s a quick study in texting for skaters. No matter how old you are, you’ll be able to use these to let your skate buddies know URHIP:
FS – False start
BFF – Back four feet
LOL – Last off line
WTF – Way too fast (What did you THINK it meant?!)
LPWO – Late pass wipe out
PPPANTS – Power pass placement advancement needs top speed
ROTFSMAO – Rolling on the floor, skating my azz off
NOHOMO – I really admire your form
NSIM – The one and only Northshore Inline Marathon (can’t joke about that)
CSOT – Can’t sit on toilet
K – Okay (because OK wasn’t short enough)
CWDS – Can’t walk down stairs
BOTP – Back of the pack
LEGS – Mantia spotting
GFTL – Go fast, turn left
BMTB – Broke my tail bone
RROMK – Rink rash on my knees
RROMA – Road rash on my azz
360 – SDotCarter just threw a signature pass
FART – Fell attempting right turn
SWTO – Speed Weenie twelve o’clock
T2TB – Time to turn & burn
LOLL – Lapped on last lap
911 – Call an ambulance, I think I broke something
911!!! – Call the next of kin, this guy is toast
CAT5 – I’m going to eat this guy’s lunch (Go on, get upset about it)
CAT4 – Well, look at you! See ya!
CAT3 – Damn, that was fun but I broke a sweat…and I think I have a hernia.
CAT2 – Can I draft behind you? Uh, wait…this was a bad idea…why don’t you just leave me alone… please…sorry.
CAT1 – Hey, that’s a sweet bike you’ve got there. Can I buff your seat?
BIFF – Bit the big one
There have got to be others…feel free to share!
Don’t forget the live NSC FEED happening tonight and tomorrow, live from Roanoke, VA. Click the link below, it’s T2TB.