Inline texting

Texting. It’s something you just have to do if you want to communicate with anyone too young to remember the original line-up of KISS. I have to admit, I take a dim view of it, best summed up by Bradley Cooper in the movie The Hangover. My great fear is that one day my sorry butt’s gonna get clipped by someone texting while otherwise engaged…

It took 57 blocks to catch the jam skater, 2 seconds to get a 28" wheel up the keister.

Still, I do appreciate the shorthand nature of texting. But being a marketing consultant working with Baby Boomers, I’ve come to learn that it’s going to be a while before the older set gets on-board with anything other that LOL or LMAO.

So…in an effort to bridge the generational divide, here’s a quick study in texting for skaters. No matter how old you are, you’ll be able to use these to let your skate buddies know URHIP:

FS – False start

BFF – Back four feet

LOL – Last off line

WTF – Way too fast (What did you THINK it meant?!)

LPWO – Late pass wipe out

PPPANTS – Power pass placement advancement needs top speed

ROTFSMAO – Rolling on the floor, skating my azz off

NOHOMO – I really admire your form

NSIM – The one and only Northshore Inline Marathon (can’t joke about that)

CSOT – Can’t sit on toilet

K – Okay (because OK wasn’t short enough)

CWDS – Can’t walk down stairs

BOTP – Back of the pack

LEGS – Mantia spotting

GFTL – Go fast, turn left

BMTB – Broke my tail bone

RROMK – Rink rash on my knees

RROMA – Road rash on my azz

360 – SDotCarter just threw a signature pass

FART – Fell attempting right turn

SWTO – Speed Weenie twelve o’clock

T2TB – Time to turn & burn

LOLL – Lapped on last lap

911 – Call an ambulance, I think I broke something

911!!! – Call the next of kin, this guy is toast

CAT5 – I’m going to eat this guy’s lunch (Go on, get upset about it)

CAT4 – Well, look at you! See ya!

CAT3 – Damn, that was fun but I broke a sweat…and I think I have a hernia.

CAT2 – Can I draft behind you? Uh, wait…this was a bad idea…why don’t you just leave me alone… please…sorry.

CAT1 – Hey, that’s a sweet bike you’ve got there. Can I buff your seat?

BIFF – Bit the big one

There have got to be others…feel free to share!

Don’t forget the live NSC FEED happening tonight and tomorrow, live from Roanoke, VA. Click the link below, it’s T2TB.

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One response to “Inline texting

  1. Pingback: March 1st 2011- Roller & Inline Speed Skating- Part 4 Of 4

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