Tag Archives: Glenn Koshi

Attention all Bont shoppers

Here’s a screaming deal for all you Bont aficionado’s or those of you who’ve been thinking about getting a pair for Christmas…direct from Glenn Koshi:

All in-stock (Glenn’s inventory) Jet boots, normally $205, now $150100mm Jet packages, normally $399, now $299. 110mm Jet packages, normally $420, now $320.  Shipping and taxes extra, please.

Email or call the man, NOW! 24 hours a day, 7 days a week…his prices are so low he’s practically giving it all away! Call or email CRAZY GLENN today…his prices are INSANE (while supplies last)! 760-798-1788 or glenn916@yahoo.com.

Off to Lincoln

Skaters from across the nation are on the road this holiday weekend in search of gold and other precious medals in Lincoln, Nebraska. It’s time for the 2010 Inline Speed Skating Indoor Nationals! I thought it only appropriate to pause for a moment and reflect on a word from the Most Interesting Man in the World, on Rollerblading:

Good luck to all of the competitors, may the best boy & girls, men & women make us all proud!

Be sure to watch all the action live starting on Sunday at SkatersPlace:

http://www.skatersplace.com/

SPECIAL OF THE MONTH!

And now…when you purchase any Bont skate package (boots, frames, wheels and bearings), stock or custom, you’ll get a free black Bont Skate Backpack, value $70!

The backpack everyone wants!

Not valid with any other specials or discounts and available exclusively from Glenn Koshi. Email him directly at glenn916@yahoo.com. Tell him you heard about it here at FirstLoser!

6/24/10 Training: Did a light 10k for breakfast. Promised Horseypants I wouldn’t skate in the afternoon due to tomorrow being “the big day.”

6/25/10 Training: 100 miles, 6:59:41:84…but who’s counting? War & Peace Post coming soon.

6/26/10 Training: 1 1/2 hours with the Rink Rabbits. Actually felt pretty good. Focus on Nationals.

6/27/10 Training: 2 hours with the big kids going round & round. One of the former Pro’s was timed at 9.3 on a fly-by for 100m. The rest of the fast crowd, including the coach, tied at 9.4. I was 2 1/10th of a second off my PBR, so I wasn’t complaining about that. Did spend plenty of time complaining about my ankle though. Tweaked from the 100 mile skate.

6/28/10 Training: Took a day off. So sue me.

6/29/10 Training: 10k for breakfast, Rink Rabbits for an afternoon snack!

6/30/10 Training: 17 miles for breakfast, getting my “100 mile legs” under me for a pretty good time. Did another 12 at lunch, but didn’t feel as good about it as I had in the morning.

7/1/10 Training: 12 miles for breakfast, another 13 for lunch. Finally fixed the ankle problem in my right skate and have been as giddy as a schoolboy all day as a result. DAMN – woulda, shoulda, coulda done that BEFORE the 100 mile thing…

National skate to work day…interrupted

Nothing like a National Day of “Boogie Flicking” (“insert sport/activity here”) to get a nation of weekend warriors off their collective duff and out on the roads and trails and in the way of those of us who’re out there everyday workin’ it.  Like so many couch-commandos that flock into the gym every January 2nd to stink up the place for three weeks of paying their resolutions lip service, these people are generally a menace to society, my senses and themselves.

"I SAID ON YOUR LEFT ASSCLOWN!!!"

I mean, come on, even most of of the regular recreational cycling crowd are a laughable lot. (Dramatic note: here I take on the role of elitist inline skater snob…the speed weenie.) Most of these guys, and unfortunately some gals too, cut an impressive Big Bad John figure in their phantastic spandex get-ups. They seriously believe that 2 hours a week spent pedaling around town clipped onto their $7,000 carbon-fiber, rolling 2nd mortgages with a long and firm leather saddle jammed up their crack is akin to a healthy, active lifestyle. God bless ’em, I don’t know how some of them do it…

Screw that biggest loser diet, I'm making progress with this bike, one mile at a time. Mmmm, is that Burger King I smell?

While it’s true that I foster a general disdain for cyclists of all sorts, it’s the “roadies” I’m speaking of here. It’s only because of their own arrogance, ineptitude and outright stupidity. I’ve witnessed Lance-wannabes doing some very dangerous stuff on the trails, and I’ve got friends who’ve met a few of these crank-wankers up close and personal-like, with blunt, traumatic force and righteous indignation.

I don’t deny the Rancor-like brute strength of the need for speed, but left unchecked by reasonable restraint in the hands of Johnny Sprockets and the Saddle Stains and it’s a recipe for rec-trail run-ins that you end up reading about in the police blotter. It’s the hot dogs who zig-zag in and out of everyone’s path going 30 miles an hour that are the single greatest cause of bad reputations, poor inter-sport relations, unenforceable trail speed limits and unnecessarily perforated colons. (Actually, that last one is a twisted revenge fantasy not unlike the NYPD/Abner Loima incident that I indulge every time I see a cyclist in full-moron mode.)

At this point, responsible adults would start to wonder about this public display of unbridled hostility…after all, I do coach a team of younglings. My skill at outsmarting nationwide criminal background checks with Force abilities that some would consider “unnatural” notwithstanding, I like to think of myself as a reasonable, safety-minded person. By that I mean that when I’m on a multi-use trail during high-instance of human encounter hours, I have a healthy respect for limits, personal space, common courtesy and trail etiquette.  I can’t say that for most of the Tony Trek-offs I see on a weekly basis. And today was the icing on the cake.

Can you say copyright infringement? Go get 'em Team Rollerblade Legal, LLC!

National Bike Your Slack Butt Into Work Day always brings out the fork-flakes. It’s bad enough when Schmucky Shimano thinks he owns the trail when you come up on him and he’s out there by himself, but put him out there with multiples of other pedal pushing pecker-heads that dust off their seats once a year for “the big two mile ride!” and you really see some amazing stuff. Really – these folks are driving cars the rest of the year, I think that’s an even scarier thought. It’s as if their IQ drops 40 full points just clipping one foot in. All knowledge of basic road safety and decency evaporate quicker than Lady Gaga’s popularity in the Seinfeld home. In the 6 measly miles I skated from my start point to my office I saw 2 stem-rods in Discovery Channel jerseys terrorizing young children and a new mom, a dog walker, a jogger and an elderly woman by flying by unannounced, then flipping the bird when one of the spazed-out victims had the unmitigated gall to call them on it. It’s pedal-power-tripping and it’s disgusting. Really fires up the ‘ol Irish in me. That’s why I enjoy dusting them when I can, every time I can, just because I can. I was able to get one chain-grease choker, and it felt good. Could have been the good Reverend Smedley out there for his morning 5 mile ride, I could give a rat’s tail. No more Mr. Nice Guy. From now on with all of these guys, you see me coming, you’d better move…over…as far right as you can. On your left, Louima!

(Editorial note: Please be sure to start flaming me when I begin posting that I’ve begun cycling cross-training later next month.)

6/12/10 Training: Just did indoor with the Rink Rabbits, helping a certain someone get ready for Nationals.

6/13/10 Training: Got my butt kicked by the kids for two hours in the morning. Set a personal best 100m lap time so I’m not complaining. 110 mm wheels and better technique are helping me level the field with some of the faster guys too.

6/14/10 Training: Day off from skating. Still one of the hardest things to do of all the training, but absolutely necessary!

6/15/10 Training: 19 miles in the hood in darn good time. Happy with the way these training skates are going. Spent the evening being filmed for a music video at Rollerland with Speedy Weezy, Speed Demon and Lionheart, and a few dozen friends from work. Will post it up here someday…

6/16/10 Training: Tabata Protocol for lunch, up the big hill in 85 degree heat. Had to rush back for a company meeting, at which I was sweating profusly, coughing uncontrollably and wondering aloud why the hell I’m doing this to myself…

6/17/10 Training: 10k for lunch, just to keep the blood flowing and the motivation up. Did a special make-up practice with the Rink Rabbits in the afternoon, working on foundational drills and this. If you’re smart, you’ll click that link.

6/18/10 Training: Day off from skating, but took a one hour power-walk at lunch. Sorry, power walking is for people who want to desperately convince themselves they’re working out. Brahahahaha – NOT!!! (Someone is gonna hate me for that one – can’t shake my cycle-rant character!)

6/19/10 Training: 19 miles at sunrise. Beautiful day but I wasn’t happy with my pace. Felt like I couldn’t get out of my own way. Rink Rabbits were awesome, these kids are flying! And the rink now has air conditioning! Wahoo!

6/20/10 Training: 20 miles at sunrise followed by 2 hours indoor with the fast kids. The Fast Kid and Smiley Sk8s are burning down the barn, but of course they don’t feel ready for IDN! Father’s Day was awesome, Dadioso had a very good day!

6/21/10 Training: 10k for breakfast,20k+ for lunch, could not stop eating! Nice sunburn on the back of my arms from wearing this jersey.

6/22/10 Training: Tabata Protocol for lunch. A little easier to breath afterward this time. Rink Rabbits in the afternoon, had fun playing chase the rabbit!

6/23/10 Training: 29 miles today total. Getting ready to skate 140 continuous miles this Friday…oy vey, what have I gotten myself into?

If I could talk to the animals

I’m not usually one to threaten small, defenseless animals, but there’s a reason we’re at the top of the food chain, and I’m cashing in my Darwinian Lottery Ticket…Yo, Ranger Rick. Watch your back. Beware I say! This is fair warning. In the spirit of full disclosure, you need to know something about me.  I have a dark side. While my life and household have shared space with many of your domesticated friends, all of whom I’ve loved dearly (all except the freaking parrot,) I’m not an animal lover when I have eight wheels strapped to my feet.

What you need to understand, my furry little friend, is that My Big Backyard has a skate path running through it. You and your little critter friends have A LOT of other places you can frolic and lollygag. Here’s the message I need you to carry back to the burrow: All of you – particularly squirrels, geese, snakes and bunnies – If you want to stay off the endangered list, keep off the damn skate path.

My "Goodwill Ambassador to the Animal Planet" credentials have been irrevocably revoked, regardless of the outcome of the investigation.

When you see me coming, you need to disperse in an orderly fashion. Preferably to the right, but definitely out of the way. These little games of zig-zag and bob’n’weave are going to get someone hurt – and it won’t be me. I’m bigger than you. A lot bigger. And I’m faster too. And with these big 110mm wheels, I’m more inclined to just roll right over you rather than try and guess which way you’re going to finally break. No more hippity-hopping for me. I got no time to mess around.

No time to mess around because I just got bibbed for the 2010 Northshore Inline Marathon yesterday. I’m in a new division, and I’ve got a lot of work to do between now and September 11. Being in a division that includes the likes of Tony Muse and Norm Kirby (among many other notable names and Facebook friends) opens up a whole new world of hurt when it comes to the level of training I need to put in if I want to have any hope of starting strong, getting in a good line and hanging on at their top speeds. So I’ve got no time to watch for goose poop, snakes that look like sticks, and assorted four legged fuzzballs. You take the woodland, leave the 8 foot wide concrete slab to me. This way, we’ll be able to avoid any unfortunate events that may leave a certain little bunny family wondering why daddy went down to the skate path and never came back. Capisce?

SPECIAL FOR FIRST LOSER READERS!

For a limited time, you can get a sweet new set of 110 Hyper Sidewinders. Here’s the deal from our new sponsor:

Click the link above to email Glenn Koshi directly (glenn916@yahoo.com). Be quick, they’re going fast. I’m ordering mine now!
5/12/10 Training: Day off. Mandatory. Weather totally blew anyway so who cares.
5/13/10 Training: Did a pretty intense session in the gym. I sweated a lot. It was only a half hour, but I was feeling the impact for three days after.
5/14/10 Training: Sunrise skate was a 10k on the CadoMotus Pro 110’s I’m test driving. Much more on this whole process of test driving to come.
5/15/10 Training: Took Speedy Weezy & Speed Demon for a “Super-Secret” session. These kids are champs!
5/16/10 Training: Indoor with the Rink Rabbits was fun. Finally came up with a way to make training for relay a lot less dangerous and a lot of fun! Then did 2 hours with the “big kids” working on speed. Lot’s of intervals. The coach was skating so hard that he burned a hole clean through the bottom of his boot and caused a blister on the bottom of his foot. (I could smell the carbon burning during the drills.)
5/17/10 Training: 13 miles at lunch. The weather was perfect, the hills were a bit tougher because of yesterday, but they’re getting easier. I’ve promised myself that I’ll hit every hill on my training route, which forces me to do the one I usually think of as optional because it’s slightly off the route right at the end. Too bad they don’t run SPIM the way they used to!

Casting party

Have you ever stepped in warm dog poo barefoot? I’ve actually done it; will never forget it. We were frolicking in the yard, running under the sprinkler, and I hit the jackpot – WHAM! Landed flat on my back, the warm ooze still soft between my toes and slick down through my heel. Ah the glory days of youth! So while I’ve never been cast for custom boots, I at least know what it feels like. Or so I’m told… 

"Damnnnn, Diddy!"

The Speed Weasels, the outdoor team I roll with, had a custom-boot casting party a few weeks ago. Glenn Koshi, the master caster himself, made the trip out here to Northern Colorado to coat the feet of the weasels in gooey socks, casting their peds for cushy new pairs of custom Bont Vaypors! 

Titanium T.'s fetish collection.

I was the odd man out, not being cast ’cause I’m “broke as a joke, G!” Well, not really, but I just didn’t have the heart to tell Glenn I’m not a big believer in custom boots. If I had foot problems maybe, but I’ve actually done OK making out-of- the-box skates work really well – particularly with the help of his invention, the EZee Fits

We're really very sensitive when one is vulnerable. This could have been worse.

For those who skate custom Bont, Glenn Koshi is an ICON. The man has been casting boots longer than the lifespan of your average penguin (wiki that) and he’s been coaching even longer. A true gentlemen of the sport. His talents for shaping the casting sock, calling out the hot spots and making sure you get the perfect fit are known the world over. The Speed Weasels were honored to have him to ourselves for the weekend. 

Pretty much what you'd see in the locker room with these guys. Now you know.

I was struck by how light these Bonts are. Particularly with the magnesium frames. And I almost lost control when I saw Tony’s new black & silver set up. Sweet ride! 

In 8 to 10 weeks I'll be kicking myself for not getting a pair myself. These will be 3 point Vaypors 110's.

OK, so a minute earlier I was saying I don’t believe in customs. That doesn’t mean I’d NEVER get a pair. I’m just not ready yet. But I know as soon as these guys show up on the trail in their new skates, I’m going to be torqued at myself for not taking the plunge. 

"Damn John. A little warning would have been nice." "Sorry, it's my vegetarian diet."

Because Glenn is so good at what he does, I was tempted to have him cast me and hold the molds while I decided how I’d convince Horseypants that custom Bont’s make a great 40th birthday present. But as it turns out, Glenn will only guarantee a cast for a month, because he says feet are always changing. Hearing that I knew it’d take me longer than that to get the courage to tell Horseypants what that great 40th birthday present would cost, so I let the opportunity pass. Cheaper than a new Camaro yes, but not as useful for carting the kids to skating practice. 

If you’d like to have Glenn come cast for your team, it’s easy: get 5-7 of your teammates to commit and he’ll be on the next plane. He quick, efficient, and in the minds of these Speed Weasels – THE BEST! Contact him directly through the E-mail Us tab on FunRoll.com. Get there by clicking here

2/20/10 Training: Indoor practice with the Rink Rabbits in the morning. Lot’s of race focus this week – we’re going to Wichita on Friday! We’ve got a good-sized group going: Speedy Weazy & Mr. Finn’s first meet; “the fast siblings” making their season opener; “the fast kid” with something to prove after NC; the “shoulder roller” making her comeback. In the evening, did 1 hour on the slideboard. Feeling 98% recovered from the stomach flu. The slide felt good. The time off hasn’t hurt. I think it’s actually helped. Easier to stay in tight, tail-tucked position for most of the hour. 

2/21/10 Training: 2 hours indoors. We didn’t do any plyos this week so we could get the kids ready for Wichita. Being the night after Apolo’s exciting Bronze in the 1,000, we had a blast running the short track, trying to look like him. Worked on fighting through with our passes, good starts, front end strategy. The most fun I’ve had all year on wheels! 

2/22/10 Training: 1 hour on the elliptical, level 9, 6.1 miles.